YWednesday, July 18, 2007
depression.
that simple word has taken over me, over my whole body, i can just feel it. i can feel the tears stinging my eyes. i can feel my cheeks wet. and i can feel my two eyes turning red.
depression.
do any of us know why that feeling ever just comes out of nowhere and hurts us pretty badly?
maybe its because youre just hiding from the world and are afraid of showing what you have got for it.
depression.
one word that everybody suffers from, a word i'm suffering from. how can i get rid of it? only time can tell. you know there is this saying where they say "time heals everything" but you know what? time has done nothing, it does practically nothing then make the situation worse. i wish it would go away already. but it just won't. i can't shake this feeling that everythings gonna get worse. i can't shake this feeling that its never gonna get better for me. because i see my friends get better but why dont i? why can't time just heal me for once? i'm starting to hate life all over again, i'm supposed to get past that, i'm supposed to remember that life is just life. nothing too hard.
You should probably go away, and leave me alone, because i dont wanna infect anybody and let depression take over them too, i'd rather live by myself than have anybody having to live with that feeling, because that feeling sucks big time and its pretty hard to let go of...
-sigh-
i'm talking crazy again. but i'm not. i dont know what i'm doing right now. i have all these mixed up emotions right now and its pretty damn confusing.
seriously? i'm not okay.
Chellie, im not okay.
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